The sexual problems can develop at any age, but most women
experience greater difficulties before age 30, while most men will experience
them after 50 years. This means that many couples are sexually out of sync,
with their problems causing conflict in the early life of one and the other
being caused later.
Of course, like all generalizations, these observations have
their limits. It is quite possible that young men or older women will develop
significant sexual problems. But it is usually the other way around. Those who
have a perspective on this are more likely to feel prepared - and enjoy sex
throughout their lives, explains the best sexologist in Delhi,
India.
Sexual problems of young lovers
Many young people experience sexual problems: performance
anxiety and concerns about penis size,
premature
ejaculation, ejaculation problems and, occasionally, erectile dysfunction.
But the two biggest problems for young men - anxiety about penis size
and premature
ejaculation (PE) - can usually be resolved with a sexologist in
Delhi, India.
Young women's sexual concerns tend to be more complicated.
Girls grow up wanting to explore their sexuality but receive mixed messages. If
they feel shy or avoid boys' approaches, they are "rude" or
"cold". But if they seem overly anxious, they are "easy" or
"sluts".
Young women are created to value attractiveness and
desirability, but with so much emphasis on looking desirable, they may not feel
much space to experience their own desire.
Young women are also concerned about the risk of pregnancy
and are deeply disappointed if they are with men who seem less concerned.
Finally, when young women experience sex, they often do with
young men who know little about women's sexuality, specifically the importance
of the clitoris for their erotic satisfaction.
Most young men (and many older men) think that sexual
intercourse is the key to women's pleasure and orgasm. Most women enjoy the
special closeness of taking action. But only 25 percent of women are
consistently orgasmic due to intercourse alone. To have orgasms, most need
soft, sustained caresses on the clitoris. As a result of the ignorance of many
young people, many young women do not receive the stimulation they need and
have difficulty with orgasm. But when young women experience orgasm
difficulties, they often take the wrong responsibility and think they are
somehow defective, says sexologist doctor in Delhi,
India.
It takes time, often years, for young women to feel
comfortable with their sexuality. The process usually involves becoming
assertive with men about the erotic rhythm they prefer (usually slower with
more kisses, hugs and mutual massage throughout the body) and sexual movements
that allow them to be sufficiently lubricated and aroused to have orgasms.
At age 30 or older, as they become more experienced in life
and sex, most women make peace (more or less) with their sexuality. Most become
more comfortable with what they like and allow themselves, possibly having
vaginal intercourse alone, but probably combined with direct stimulation of the
clitoris with hand, tongue, or vibrator.
Sexual problems of older lovers
As women advance in their early forties, they begin to enter
menopause. This creates two new problems: vaginal dryness and vaginal atrophy,
thinning of the vaginal wall, which can make intercourse uncomfortable and
sometimes impossible. Dryness can develop at any age, but it becomes more
prevalent after 40. Thinning of vaginal tissue usually becomes a problem after
55 years. Fortunately, sexual lubricants relieve most dryness and help protect
against atrophy-related irritation during intercourse. Another approach is sex
without sex - manual, oral, vibrator, etc.
In addition, older women face another challenge -
demographics. On average, women live longer than men. As they get older, many
must deal with widowhood, men with erectile
dysfunction (ED) who believe (incorrectly) that they are
sexually defeated and the fact that older men often stalk younger women. As a
result, older women struggle with diminishing sexual opportunities for
partners, says sex specialist in Delhi.
As difficult as older women's sexual dilemmas can be, older
men's problems tend to be more frightening. After 50 years, the nervous system
is less excited. Men who were constantly aroused during their twenties often
felt that they had trouble feeling aroused. This is a big reason why many
middle-aged and older men view pornography - to reassure themselves that they
can still become aroused, explains top sexologist in Delhi.
In addition, at age 65, most men develop at least some erectile
dysfunction. The cause is often medical, including: diabetes,
obesity and heart disease. These conditions reduce blood flow into the penis
and cause an erection in the condition of a negative rash, starting around 45
to 50 years and later, mild ED that often becomes more severe. And when older
men have erections, they are not as strong or as firm as before, and can end up
in the middle of sex, often for no apparent reason. Erection medications may
help but may not. At best, these changes are disconcerting. At worst, men
decide that they are no longer sexually functional, often with great disdain
for their partners, explains sex doctor in Delhi.
In addition, many older men continue to experience premature
ejaculation. The EP is not just a youth problem. A quarter to a
third of adult men of all ages have poor ejaculatory control. But many older
men experience a resurgence of PE, just as their erections begin to fail. One
of the main causes of PE is stress, for example, the stress of developing
erection difficulties, says sexologist
in South Delhi.
The sexual changes of older men can be unnerving. After
decades of taking libido and sexual functions for granted, after about 50 years
or more, it is no longer automatic. This can be confusing and frustrating,
causing some men to "retire" from sex.
Fortunately, men can adapt to sex when they are older,
moving from sexual love based on sex to one without sex. If you are not having
sex, there is no need for erections.
Older men do not need erections to have wonderful orgasms.
This is true, in an erotic context (candlelight, music, seductive lover), with
sufficient stimulation (masturbation and toys), men with weak erections or even
completely flaccid penises can still have satisfying orgasms, says sexologist
in East Delhi.
Sex without sex requires adjustments. Most lovers have spent
decades with sexual intercourse central to their love. But older couples who
remain sexually active often evolve into other wonderful ways to be sexual.
The best sex of your life
For couples with long relationships, the stage of life with
the fewest sexual problems usually occurs between the ages of thirty and forty.
At this stage, most women have transcended the sexual issues that afflict young
women and most men have not yet had to address the sexual concerns of older
men.
But no sexual issue of any gender at any age prevents great
sex. Just as people can develop sexual problems at any age, people can also
cope and enjoy wonderful love at any age. By understanding what to expect
throughout life and making the generally simple adjustment that preserves great
sex.
Finally, at any stage of life, if you have sexual problems
that cannot be resolved with information and self-help, professional sex treatment in
Delhi usually helps.
